Literary Experience Wednesday: Walt Whitman

"I CELEBRATE myself, and sing myself,

And what I assume you shall assume,

For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

I loafe and invite my soul,

I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.

My tongue, every atom of my blood, form'd from this soil, this air,

Born here of parents born here from parents the same, and their parents the same,

I, now thirty-seven years old in perfect health begin,

Hoping to cease not till death.

Creeds and schools in abeyance,

Retiring back a while sufficed at what they are, but never forgotten,

I harbor for good or bad, I permit to speak at every hazard,

Nature without check with original energy [. . . ]"

Walt Whitman is my favorite American poet. And my favorite poem of his is from his book

Leaves of Grass. He's known for being an acceptor and lover of all people. His poem Song of Myself is one of the most beautiful ever written (that beginning excerpt is the beginning of the poem). It is very long, but it's basically a rundown of all people, in perfect detail, a mere observation of them and himself, the world around him, and how all of this is a part of him; and every now and then he adds little maxims and insights about the things he's describing. I wish everyone could read the poem in its entirety. It creates some amazing images; some created in one line, some by a whole concentrated stanza. For example:

"The bride unrumples her white dress, the minute-hand of the clock moves slowly,

The opium-eater reclines with rigid head and just-open'd lips,

The prostitute draggles her shawl, her bonnet bobs on her tipsy and pimpled neck,

The crowd laugh at her blackguard oaths, the men jeer and wink to each other,

(Miserable! I do not laugh at your oaths nor jeer you;)

The President holding a cabinet council is surrounded by the great Secretaries,

On the piazza walk three matrons stately and friendly with twined arms,

The crew of the fish-smack pack repeated layers of halibut in the hold,

The Missourian crosses the plains toting his wares and his cattle,

As the fare-collector goes through the train he gives notice by the jingling of loose change,

The floor-men are laying the floor, the tinners are tinning the roof,

the masons are calling for mortar,

In single file each shouldering his hod pass onward the laborers;

Seasons pursuing each other the indescribable crowd is gather'd,
it is the fourth of Seventh-month, (what salutes of cannon and small arms!)

Seasons pursuing each other the plougher ploughs,
the mower mows, and the winter-grain falls in the ground;

Off on the lakes the pike-fisher watches and waits by the hole in the frozen surface,

The stumps stand thick round the clearing, the squatter strikes deep with his axe,

Flatboatmen make fast towards dusk near the cotton-wood or pecan-trees,

Coon-seekers go through the regions of the Red river

or through those drain'd by the Tennessee, or through those of the Arkansas,

Torches shine in the dark that hangs on the Chattahooche or Altamahaw,

Patriarchs sit at supper with sons and grandsons and great-grand- sons around them,

In walls of adobie, in canvas tents, rest hunters and trappers after their day's sport,

The city sleeps and the country sleeps,

The living sleep for their time, the dead sleep for their time,

The old husband sleeps by his wife and the young husband sleeps by his wife;

And these tend inward to me, and I tend outward to them,"

One passage, right in the middle, sums it all up.
"And such as it is to be of these more or less I am,

And of these one and all I weave the song of myself."

3 Nights Forward and 2 Nights Back

I suppose having two BAD nights in a row could also mean another kind of trend is here . . . I think it may have come to that. :( I think I figured out the problem though. Her daytime naps sometimes get too long I think. The problem is that she just seems SO exhausted to me. When she's hard to wake up I think "well, she must really need the sleep." AND I have other things to do, other children to see to, and I frankly just lose track of how long she's been napping--I was just enjoying the lighter load. What really baffles me is that, although she takes good naps during the day, which she should, she didn't even hardly doze during the night. I do know she had an upset tummy in the night because she was a noisy little thing, and I don't mean crying. :) It's probably a combination of the naps and the tummy. Dave and I had to tag team a couple of hours back and forth, which is aweful. When you're that tired, two hours of sleep feels like two seconds. Oh well. Dave is taking his nap now, and I'll get a nice one (hopefully) when the babies nap this afternoon.

Big sister woes

The other day I turned around to find that Audrey had climbed into Jane's carseat, put Jane's binkie in her mouth, and pulled Jane's blankie over herself . . . all while attempting her best (yet clearly fake) baby whine. I guess the pressures of being a big sister are really getting to her.

2 fer 2

Ok. Last night was another good night. She did wake up once to eat, but I can handle that. It was a lovely morning of sleeping in for the whole Hunt family. I think this is the start of a trend, folks. But, unfortunately, we're leaving town in two weeks and this will probably all go down the tubes once we get to Grammy and Grampy's house. :p Oh well! I'll stop complaining so I don't jix the good times I have right now!

[Cue Hallelujah Chorus.]

Last night Jane slept. She slept a sound, solid, restful sleep. It lasted for 10 hours. No waking up in the middle of the night to eat, no squirming because of gas, to crying because of an upset tummy. Nothing. Just peacful slumber. I think Captain Hook said it best:

"How still the night is; nothing sounds alive. Now is the hour when children in their homes are a-bed; their lips bright-browned with the good-night chocolate, and their tongues drowsily searching for belated crumbs housed insecurely on their shining cheeks . . . Split my infinitives, but 'tis my hour of triumph! . . . All mortals envy me . . ."

Obviously, he was going for dramatic irony, but those words take on new meaning for me. I clutch those hours of sleep tightly to my soaring heart and pray this pattern of restful nights continues.

2 years old!

Audrey's birthday was yesterday. She's such a big girl now. Her day started off by having a fun playgroup with her friends at Mia's house (thanks, guys!) and with lots of phone calls from grandparents, even Edgar and Sarah called to wish her a happy birthday. :)

The cake was pink strawberry cake for Audrey, yummy cream cheese frosting for Mommy. ;)  She could hardly keep her hands out of it.


Her present (thanks to the Broadheads!) was Devon's old slide! She loves the one at Mia's so much that we just knew she'd be thrilled with one of her very own. And we were right. Happy Birthday, Audrey!!

Literary Experience Wednesday: This is Just to Say

This is Just to Say

by William Carlos Williams

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast.

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold.

Update on lots of things

David

David's 2nd year of law school is almost over. Thank goodness. It's been crazy. Besides normal classes and job hunting, David was on Law Review and the Moot Court board. In fact, right after I had the baby, David had to be at school until about 10:30 pm every night for 2 weeks to run the first-year's moot court competition. A few good things did come out of that though. Not only did I get to attend a couple very fancy dinners (The French Bistro and ZaZas) with important people (federal judges, etc.), but at the big ending dinner the president of the moot court board , a very nice guy named Quinton, stood up to give his "thank you" speech. I settled in for the usual long-winded speech that I don't know anything about, but he started by saying "first of all, someone at this table had a baby a few weeks ago" I looked up and looked around thinking that that was nice, and wondering who it was. He then said "this person has sacrificed an incredible amount during this competition. So we would like to thank Crystal Hunt for allowing David to be absent so much during these past two weeks" . . . or something like that. I was stunned! I didn't really know Quinton, I'd only met him the night before very briefly. I just thought it was very very nice, because I DID sacrifice a LOT because Dave was working on moot court. Then he went on to thank David of course for all of his help because Dave was one of the two vice chancellors of internal competitions (which, I don't know what that means, but it sounds impressive and it takes a lot of time when there is a competition going on).

We also go to go to a dinner for the law review which was also very nice except the waitress spilled a very full glass of freezing cold ice water all over me. Which wouldn't be so bad except it spilled on my shirt, which was more awkward than usual because pretty much everyone knew that I had recently had a baby, and I didn't want people to think I was lactating or something. Oh well.

Dave's next hurdle was the big mock trial for his trial advocacy class. He said it went pretty well. He said that the cases they use are written to be very even (unlike real life cases, which are not often that close) so if both sides do a good job, the jury will rarely be able to return a verdict (which has to be unanimous). In fact, verdicts are only won in these exercises if one side does a great job and the other side does a bad job. Dave went against one of our best friends and she is very smart, so he wasn't upset when the jury was hung and couldn't return a verdict either way. The crazy part was, one of the jury members (just volunteers from the community) offered dave an unsolicited critique. He told dave that he "shouldn't be so tmid, and add more inflection in your voice because you are kind of monotone" etc.! Can you believe that!? If this guy knew Dave at all he would know that Dave is the last person to be timid or monotone. Dave told me that he was a little quieter than usual maybe because he was cross examining an old man who had (in the case) just seen his wife die, which naturally would call for some sensitivity. Well, anyway, the guy who gave these comments told Dave that he was an acting teacher (not at Cornell or anything, just...somewhere). and if Dave wanted to improve his style he could call the guy up. Um...maybe some other time. Hahahaha. I studied acting for 4 years in school, and I know for a fact that Dave is a darn good actor. Not that either of us are really bugged about the whole thing, we just thought it was very funny.

His next hurdle is a big legal ethics paper that's due soon. Then one final exam in Dave's tax class. Then we're out of here! He's going to work for Baker Botts in Dallas for the summer (then we'll be back), as I may have mentioned before. We're excited. He starts work on May 12th. We're driving from here to Missouri on the 8th, after he finishes his final, through the night so the girls will sleep and not get their schedules thrown off. He'll leave me and the girls with my parents to visit (my little bro was getting married, but he's not anymore) until we can move into our apartment on the 27th. Meanwhile, he'll drive on to Dallas and stay with his uncle in Plano. We'll miss him, but we'll both probably have a lot less stress this way--he won't have to worry about those late get-to-know-you things and dinners and having to leave us alone a lot during those beginning weeks, and we will get to let Grammy and Grampy entertain and spoil Audrey and Jane while Mommy takes a nice break (and eats frozen custard every day if she wants to). When the time comes, they'll help me and the girls drive to Dallas and get settled in. We'll stay in Dallas for about 8 weeks and then we'll head to Idaho for a nice vacation with Dave's family and our old friends from school. We're very excited.

Crystal

I finished my second Podfitness workout last night. It went a lot better this time. I did much better at pacing myself. David and Jane went with me this time. Audrey was in bed already, so we locked the doors and went for a little walk. That probably sounds bad, but we checked in on her each time we went around the Hasbrouck circle. Dave pushed Jane in the stroller (which was also nice because it helped keep her asleep during her colicky time, more on that later) and really thought my new workout was cool. I also tried one of the pilates workouts, but it wasn't very challenging and was only 15 miutes long, so I decided I'd stick to the walking workout.

I'm incredibly frustrated with my camera. When I take the memory card out to upload the pictures, a lot of the time at least one of the pictures or videos didn't work or got lost. It no longer was being read on the memory card and was not there with the others on my computer. Lately it's always been the most important picture or video: a great one of Audrey making pictures with the salt at the kitchen table, a cute picture of her playing at the park with Daddy, lots of things. If anyone knows what the problem may be or how to fix it, let me know. We have a nice camera and memory card, so I don't think we need new ones, but maybe so.

I was so desperate yesterday that I called my doctor to see if I could get some meds for my allergies. Claritin wasn't working at all. (I take Xango every day, but that seems to not be doing it's job as well as I'd hoped.) I just needed a little something more. She told me I could take half a tablet of Benedryl, and keep nursing often so my milk supply doesn't dry up. And . . . IT WORKS!! It's wonderful to not have to blow my nose and suffer through itchy eyes all day long! And it usually only takes one whole pill a day to keep me comfortable, so that's good.

Audrey

Yeserday, Devon came over to play. Those two get along so well. Audrey was being very silly, as you can see. I think that's a babydoll dress on her head.

This morning David took Jane in to get Audrey out of her bed. Audrey saw her and wanted him to put the baby down by her so she could "hod da baby." He laid Jane in the crook of Audrey's arm and Audrey so sweetly hugged and cuddled her baby sister. He called me in and it was so cute. We didn't get a picture, but it was very very cute and picturesque.

Earlier this morning while I was doing dishes, Audrey got ahold of some Benedryl. Luckly I only take half a pill, so she only managed to chomp on half a tablet before I caught her. I made her spit out what was in her mouth, but she might be a little sleepier than usual today. :S Scary.

Audrey will probably be in preschool next fall. Yay! We just sent in the stuff to enroll her for a couple days a week at The Nest (where Shannah used to teach, and where McKay will go next fall too). She's going to love it, as will I.

Audrey's birthday is coming up tomorrow! She kept bringing me the cake mix box and asking for "pancakes," so I had to put it away. :) She got a cute ecard from Grammy and Grampy and Aunt Jess today--it was perfect with little monkeys opening a birthday present of bananas--Audrey got a kick out of this since she LOVES nanas! She helped me pick a thank you ecard back. It was a new and fun little experience for her.

Jane

(This is the new dress Nicole got for her. I think the flash startled her, that's why she's making such a funny face.) We're all VERY happy to report that Jane had a good night last night. It might have had something to do with the walk outside at about 12:00 to help her settle down. She was sound asleep when we came in and while we got ourselves ready for bed and things. I gave her one good feeding, changed her diaper, and put her back to bed, holding my breath thinking she'd wake up too much and cause me to stay up for 3 more hours. She went right backto sleep and slept until about 7:00! That's about five hours. Then at 7:00 she ate well, and went back to sleep again! I was amazed. She slept until about 10:30. Yay! So, although it's not the best routine in the world, we have one, and it works. Audrey goes to bed at about 9:30, we all go out for our nice little walk a little later at 11:30 after she's had a good feeding and Mommy and Daddy clean things up a bit around the house and get a little bit of last minute work in. Then we walk around for 30 minutes or so, come back in to get ready for bed and feed her again, and we all sleep peacfully through the night . . . cross your fingers!

Family Night

Saturday night after Dave's trial was done, we all decided to go out and have a family outting. We grabbed some sandwiches and took them to the park. Audrey played and played with Daddy and we all ate and played until dark. (I had a great picture of Audrey playing, but lost it.) Dave decided to climb a tree before we left when no one was around to see him acting like he was twelve. I guess you could say he was VERY happy to have the load of the trial off his shoulders.
We then put the kids back in the stroller and walked along the lake by the park. It was nice and peacful and reminded us of walking along the green belt in Idaho Falls by the temple when we were young, care-free newlyweds. After that we kept the festivities going by stopping at Purity Ice Cream on the way home. Despite our better judgement, we gave Audrey a little cone to eat, in the car, on her own. She of course bites the bottom of the cone off first, so most of the ice cream spills out hte bottom as she eats it. But the mess wasn't too bad, and she was in heaven.
When we got home, Ben and Lexi came over and joined us in watching Copying Beethoven. We love hanging out with them. The movie was alright, the company perfect, and the day just right. So fun.

We got Audrey a "big sister present" -- a play kitchen! You can't beat 8 dollars at salvation army. Naturally, after thoroughly disinfecting it, we stocked it with some cute little cooking utensils and delicious plastic food. Audrey is wearing little boy clothes because on the way to drop her off at the babysitter's (Dana's) house and to pick us up from the hospital, Audrey threw up all over the car after nearly choking on a piece of cheese. the day got even crazier when David realized that, on all the craziness of getting Audrey ready to go amid huge tantrums, he forgot her diaper bag and Jane's car seat. Thanks to Melanie, he didn't have to run all the way home to get ours. If it weren't for Dana cleaning Audrey up for us and watching her, and Melanie loaning us a car seat, the day would have been a lot more chaotic. As it was, on the way home we hit the HUGEST pothole and thought we really damaged our car. Thankfully we didn't, and the rest of the day went well.

ABC-tag from Shannah

A- ATTACHED OR SINGLE: Attached to Dave
B- BEST FRIEND: I have lots! But of course Dave is my best.
C- CAKE OR PIE: I'd like both, please.
D- DAY OF CHOICE: I'm not sure. Whatever day is preceded by a good night's sleep.
E- ESSENTIAL ITEM: Kleenex
F- FAVORITE COLOR: teal
G- GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT: having babies
H- HOMETOWN: Tipton, MO
I- INDULGENCES: fancy restaurants
J- JANUARY OR JULY: neither really. January isn't Christmas time anymore, so it's kinda a bummer. July is so so hot. But it does have a great holiday. So I think I'll pick July.
K- KIDS: 2, as in 2 cute!
L- LIFE IS INCOMPLETE WITHOUT: David and the babies
M- MARRIAGE DATE: May 5th, 2004
N- NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 3--Aaron, Jessica, and Jacob. I love them.
O- ORANGES OR APPLES: Oranges are the best fruit there is.
P- PHOBIAS OR FEARS: I have so many . . . really.
Q- QUOTES: My favorite is from Audrey, "Here go, gamma," whenever she gives something to anyone. It makes me laugh every time.
R- REASON TO SMILE: Uh, see the above mentioned quote. Audrey is the funniest little girl, as I'm sure Jane will be too once she get's out of her larva stage. :)
S- SEASON: I really like most seasons for different reasons. Winter because it's cozy and christmasy, and I don't like being too hot. Spring because it's so pretty and not too hot yet. Summer because there's always stuff going on and it's my birthday. Fall because it's so pretty and festive, and just the right temperature (it's probably my favorite).
T- TAG FIVE FRIENDS: Tasheena, Lacey, Melanie Maurer, and Jessica Thompson and Jessica Moore.
U- UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME: I used to live in Hawaii.
V- VERY FAVORITE STORE: Oh, I don't know. I like the craft store and salvation army (DI) and Ross for finding fun little gems.
W- WORST HABIT: Nagging.
X- X-RAY OR ULTRASOUND: Weird. All experiences with both were ok I guess. Ultrasounds are probably better for obvious reasons.
Y- YOUR FAVORITE FOOD: My current favorite is grilled cheese with tomato and avaocado and Mel's poppyseed dressing!
Z-YOUR ZODIAC SIGN: Gemini

Flashback Friday: Peter Pan

When I was in high school, I was in Peter Pan (the play, obviously). It was a blast. This is a picture of me (Wendy), Anna (Tinkerbell, a VERY talented little ballerina), and my good friend Lisa Johns who played Peter. She looked perfect for it, huh? She really has blonde hair, the red is a wig. She really WAS perfect for the part, and she's also very talented. The other girl was an "Indian," but I don't recall her name. This picture has a lot of other little hidden gems in it. It reminds me of so many things when I look at it. The guy on the far right was Joe the pirate. He was very good at being a pirate. A very nice and funny guy. A couple of his kids were lost boys. And speaking of lost boys, the little lost boy sitting on the bed in the stripes is my baby brother, Jacob. He was SO CUTE in that play. He has a good singing voice and isn't too shy. He's 18 now. How time does fly! The guy in the background kinda looking toward us was totally stalking me the whole time I was in the show. He was nice, but a little overbearing. And it was a little uncomfortable when he helped me get rigged up with the flying harness and mic. :S But still, a nice kid. Yes, we did fly. And I actually got to fly quite a bit. It was SO FUN!! I'd love to do it again some day. Overall, it was such a fun experience.
Here's a story for good measure:
Lisa (Peter), Anna (Tinkerbell), and I went out to dinner before a weekend show. We just had a girl's night out before we had to check in at 6:00. We put all our costumes and gear in my trunk, ate, had a great time, and when we came out, realized that I'd locked my keys in the car. We had 15 minutes until curtain call and three of the most important characters in the show were stranded with costumes locked away in my trunk. :S We made some calls; my mom, who was on her way to bring my little brother to the theater, brought us a key. We got there about 30 minutes before the curtain was to go up (which meant we had to go FAST to put all our make-up, costumes, wigs, fly gear, mics, do mic check, and warm-ups in 30 minutes!) Our director was pacing the back of the theater when we got there. I don't remember getting in trouble, but I'm sure we got a "look" and were told to hurry. :) Oh, good times.

Literary Experience Wednesday: To Autumn

This is officially my favorite poem.  I memorized it for one of my college classes. It's fun to say, and nice to hear. I suggest reading it out loud.

To Autumn by John Keats

1.
SEASON of mists and mellow fruitfulness,
Close bosom-friend of the maturing sun;
Conspiring with him how to load and bless
With fruit the vines that round the thatch-eves run;
To bend with apples the moss’d cottage-trees,
And fill all fruit with ripeness to the core;
To swell the gourd, and plump the hazel shells
With a sweet kernel; to set budding more,
And still more, later flowers for the bees,
Until they think warm days will never cease,
For Summer has o’er-brimm’d their clammy cells.

2.
Who hath not seen thee oft amid thy store?
Sometimes whoever seeks abroad may find
Thee sitting careless on a granary floor,
Thy hair soft-lifted by the winnowing wind;
Or on a half-reap’d furrow sound asleep,
Drows’d with the fume of poppies, while thy hook
Spares the next swath and all its twined flowers:
And sometimes like a gleaner thou dost keep
Steady thy laden head across a brook;
Or by a cyder-press, with patient look,
Thou watchest the last oozings hours by hours.

3.
Where are the songs of Spring? Ay, where are they?
Think not of them, thou hast thy music too,—
While barred clouds bloom the soft-dying day,
And touch the stubble plains with rosy hue;
Then in a wailful choir the small gnats mourn
Among the river sallows, borne aloft
Or sinking as the light wind lives or dies;
And full-grown lambs loud bleat from hilly bourn;
Hedge-crickets sing; and now with treble soft
The red-breast whistles from a garden-croft;
And gathering swallows twitter in the skies.

Update: Sisters

I realized that we didn't have any pictures really of Jane with her eyes open since she's been home. Yes, her eyes do open occasionally. :) When this picture of Audrey and Jane was taken, Audrey had climbed onto the couch and announced she wanted to "hod da baby" and took the boppy and put it around her like she's seen mommy do. She then stroked Jane and sang to her, not minding at all that she was screaming her head off. Very cute.

I'm happy to report that Audrey is starting to show a little tenderness and love toward her new baby sister. She always comes up to her and says, "hod da baby" and puts her hands on her (which is acutally "holding the baby" as far as Audrey is concerned, she rarely wants to acutally put her on her lap and everything). As I may have mentioned before, she likes to call her "the Cute" and of course "Nane." She gets so concerned when she cries, and yet sometimes, like when we're in the car, she doesn't act phased at all. The crying doesn't bother her unless she thinks the baby is very sad or in pain. Every now and then I catch her trying to play barbies with Jane, which usually results in Jane getting a face full of barbie hair until she gets upset and cries (that or she gets gouged with a barbie arm or foot).

Audrey has been such a happy girl this past week! She just keeps doing the cutest things. First of all, we discovered that she loves to be "nakie." I let her run around in just a diaper the other day and she couldn't stop exclaiming, "I'N NAKIE!!" She's also gotten really great at counting!! She can count to ten without skipping any numbers now. It's so cute. ("one, two, tree, pour, pive, sick, seben, eight, nine, TEN! YAY!") For the first time the other day she acutally ran to me saying "mommy! mommy!" and when I bent over and asked "what?" she just smiled and gave my legs a big hug, and ran off. It made my heart melt. She's just such a good girl and I love her so much.

Unfortunately, we're all on a horrible sleeping schedule, when we get to sleep at all. :( Jane and Audrey both sleep wonderfully . . . at very different times of the day. Audrey goes to bed late, at about 10 or 11 most nights. :( Jane goes to bed at about 7, eats at 1 or 2 a.m., and sleeps until about 6 or 6. So, we put Audrey to bed, I try to get stuff done, clean up the house, then feed Jane at 1 which takes about 45 minutes for everything, then I get a couple hours of sleep and that's it! Sometimes we're lucky and we get about 4 hours of sleep, but this past week that hasn't been so. David and I have decided to impliment a shift system--one of us takes 10-3 or so, and one of us takes 3-9--until we can get Audrey to go to sleep earlier and wake up earlier and Jane to go to bed a teeny bit later and sleep a little bit later (which probably won't happen as easily as adjusting Audrey's schedule). Anyway, it's been a little crazy. This whole system usually results in me and Audrey and Jane "napping" from 10 am to 1 in the afternoon, which is totally unacceptable because that's prime time for most people! Anyway, we're working on it. I'm so thankful for such a wonderful, helpful husband who has really been a lifesaver to me (as well as all our great friends).

Flashback Friday: Argentine Flood

This is a picture of Dave on his mission in Argentina. This picture is crazy for several reasons. Obviously that they were out in this nasty flood, but also because that water was disgusting, and he's climbing on a power pole I think (which, hello!, is totally dangerous in those conditions). But, leave it to Dave to still find humor in the situation and take a great picture to send home to the fam. AND that suit he's wearing . . . I believe that's the same suit he wears to church to this day. (That thing hanging from his hip is his hard-core Argentine scripture case. You know you're an intense missionary when you keep your scriptures in an easy-to-access holster--which wasn't as nerdy as it sounds, he assures me.)

Literary Experience Wednesday: Oranges

Oranges by Gary Soto
(I love this one because it's just so bittersweet.)

The first time I walked
With a girl, I was twelve,
Cold, and weighted down
With two oranges in my jacket.
December. Frost cracking
Beneath my steps, my breath
Before me, then gone,
As I walked toward
Her house, the one whose
Porch light burned yellow
Night and day, in any weather.
A dog barked at me, until
She came out pulling
At her gloves, face bright
With rouge. I smiled,
Touched her shoulder, and led
Her down the street, across
A used car lot and a line
Of newly planted trees,
Until we were breathing
Before a drugstore. We
Entered, the tiny bell
Bringing a saleslady
Down a narrow aisle of goods.
I turned to the candies
Tiered like bleachers,
And asked what she wanted -
Light in her eyes, a smile
Starting at the corners
Of her mouth. I fingered
A nickel in my pocket,
And when she lifted a chocolate
That cost a dime,
I didn't say anything.
I took the nickel from
My pocket, then an orange,
And set them quietly on
The counter. When I looked up,
The lady's eyes met mine,
And held them, knowing
Very well what it was all
About.

Outside,
A few cars hissing past,
Fog hanging like old
Coats between the trees.
I took my girl's hand in mine for two blocks,
Then released it to let
Her unwrap the chocolate.
I peeled my orange
That was so bright against
The gray of December
That, from some distance,
Someone might have thought
I was making a fire in my hands.

Audrey "The Nose" Hunt

Today I caught Audrey picking her nose, as usual. I figure most little kids pick their nose at some point. She probably does it because 1) I'm always messing with her nose because it's so runny and snotty all the time, so she thinks she can (although, instead of using a tissue, she uses what she has on hand, naturally), and 2) her nose really bothers her (. . . it's runny and stuffy so much), and that's how she deals with it herself. Well, after a while, I realized that her nose was BLEEDING! I thought she'd just picked it too much or something. But she was acting funny when I would wipe it. She would cough and get whiny and pull away but keep picking it, like she was trying to get something out . . . THEN I caught her shoving pieces of crackers up there!!!! Then it dawned on me . . . Audrey has been packing bits of cracker into her nose!! So, I rushed over to her and, using my trusty nose bulb, I cleaned out her nose the best I could. She had plenty of crackers up there! I scolded her plenty, but I don't know if it's enough. This means that I'm going to have to watch her even closer AND keep the livingroom floor vacuumed better. No wonder she kept asking me for more crackers!! Between this and the balloon thing, I think Audrey might be growing up to be a very strange child indeed. :S

My Life, the Soundtrack

Opening Credits: More Than a Feeling by Boston

Waking Up: Beautiful Day by U2, Here Comes the Sun (NatureQuest Version)

First Day at School: What Happens Tomorrow by Duran Duran, Bizzare Love Triangle by New Order

Care-free Day: Peaceful Easy Feeling by The Eagles, Penny Lane by The Beatles

Falling in Love: Let Me Be the One by Dep Leppard, Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional

Fight Song: Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson

Breaking Up: Love Song by Sara Bareilles, Ordinary World by Duran Duran

Prom: Lady in Red by Chris de Burgh, Dancing Queen by Abba

Mental Breakdown: Hotel California by The Eagles, Chains by Fleetwood Mac

Driving: Cover Girl by New Kids on the Block, Time After Time by Quietdrive

Christmas Morning: O Tannenbaum (A Charlie Brown Christmas Version)

Flashback: Good Morning Son by Ben Folds

Getting Back Togther: Still in Love by Boston

Wedding: The Luckiest by Ben Folds

Birth of a Child: Green Eyes by Coldplay, Aubrey by Bread

Growing Old Together: You and I by Michael Buble

Final Battle: Higher Power by Boston

Death Scene: The Scientist by Coldplay

Funeral Song: If by Bread

End Credits: Spirits Having Flown by The BeeGees

Globaphobia

When Audrey was a lot younger, she was very much afraid of balls. She would cry or crawl/run alway from them if they came near her. She grew out of it . . . so we thought. Friday night while Dana was babysitting her, Audrey displayed a significant fear of balloons. Her son had had two blown up balloons, and he was rubbing one on in his hand. When Audrey noticed the balloons, she freaked out. She ran to Dana and started shaking with fear. She told Devon to put the balloon away because Audrey was afraid of it; so he walked into his room so she couldn't see it. A moment later he walked out with it again. When Audrey saw him walking toward her with the balloon she hid under the coffee table! Dana said she was so shocked that she was so afraid. Taylor, her husdand, was upstairs, and she told him to come down and see Audrey. He didn't believe her until he showed Audrey Devon's helium balloon from across the room. They thought she was going to have a panic attack! Needless to say, they had to hide all the balloons in the closet.
Also, a few months ago, while we were out to lunch, Audrey got a balloon from a nice old man at the restaurant. Audrey was thrilled! She held on to it tightly the whole time, grin on her face, periodically smiling at us and pointing and happily saying, "bloon!" So, we just thought she was over her fear of "balls." However, after we got home, we tied the balloons on the chair, and Dave pulled one by the string down a little closer to ask her what color it was . . . all of the sudden, she got so scared! She acted panicky and didnt want the ballons anywhere near her. We were so worried about how scared she was that I asked Dave to pop them. He did, and she didnt even act afraid of the pop they made. She acted relieved and a little sad that they were gone, but ultimately she was calm.
We're assuming she'll grow out of this too, but in the meantime, we probably won't be having balloons on her birthday. :S

Flashback Friday: The Crystals

This is me with one of my best friends, Crystal Parkinson (Cox). She was my roommate for a long time at BYU-Idaho. I first met Crystal in time management class. (Why we were taking time management is beyond me; it's not like the course load at BYU-I is so intense or anything.) Anyway, I was a theatre major then, and a freshman, and I was very bubbly and happy to be there. She was nice and cool, and had lots of friends in the class. We sat on opposite sides of the room. Over the course of the class, somehow we convinced ourselves that we didn't really like each other much. I thought she was a snobby blonde, and she thought I was a weird theater major. Anyway, the class/semester passed without us ever speaking to each other, just judging from afar. And then we never thought anything of it . . . until . . . the next year and a half almost. I moved to a new apartment. The landlady said she thought her daughter, who would also be living there, knew me. I had no idea who this Crystal girl might be (bad memory, as most of you know). Then after a while I began to think it might be the girl from my class. The funny thing was, my cousin Melissa was coming to live there too (as was Crystal Cox's cousin), and we'd each told them all about the other Crystal, giving our obviously unfounded opinions from our class together.
Let me just say at this point that girls are totally stupid. At least most of them. And I was one of the stupid ones when this all happened. When the four girls (me, Melissa, Crystal, and her cousin Tiffany) finally met, we were all smiles and gushing "oh I'm so glad to meet you!" and "hey! you were in my class!" and "this is going to be so great!!" all the while secretly having these judgements against each other. How dumb! After a few weeks, both of us realized that none of those things we thought were true. We even had a little talk about our first impressions, and luckily, we had a good laugh about it, too. From that time on, she was my wing man and I hers. We did everything together. We were a great team. We had great roommate dynamics with each other, as well as with all of our other great roommates. I really really miss those days.
Now, Crystal is married to a great guy, she has a beautiful little girl who is ony a week younger than Audrey, and she's due to have her second baby in a few months. She's so beautiful. I love her so much. She was (and is) such an important part of my life. She's in Rexburg still, and I really miss her.

This is us as Cinderella's evil step-sisters at the Ward Halloween party.

Literary Experience Wednesday: In The End We Are All Light

In The End We Are All Light
Liz Rosenberg


I love how old men carry purses for their wives,
those stiff light-beige or navy wedge-shaped bags
that match the women's pumps,
with small gold clasps that click open and shut.
These men drowse off in doctors' waiting rooms,
the bags perched in their laps like big tame birds
too worn to flap away. Within, the wives slowly undress,
put on the thin white robes, consult, come out
and wake the husbands dreaming openmouthed.

And when they both rise up
to take their constitutional,
walk up and down the block, her arms are free as air,
his right hand dangles down.

So I, desiring to shed this skin
for some light silken one,
will tell my husband, "Here, hold this,"
and watch him amble off among the shining
cans of motor oil, my leather bag
slung over his massive shoulder bone,
so prettily slender-waisted, so forgiving of the ways
we hold each other down, that watching him
I see how men love women, and women men,
and how the burden of the other comes to be
light as a feather blown, more quickly vanishing.

Ode to my Blog (and the update)

Whenever I open my laptop, I yearn to blog something. I can usually manage to check into my google reader to see what all of YOU are posting and not only do I wish I had more free time to go comment on all the great stuff you post!! But I also wish I could share what's going on here more often. Every day is another crazy adventure. We have some really good days and some really bad ones. Let me elaborate.

For a while, Jane was keep me up all night with every-hour feedings and fussy time in between. This was when I began to suspect that she had some reflux issues. Poor little thing. Now, I thought it was bad to not get real sleep, but still the days were fairly managable--I could manage Audrey and get stuff done because Jane was sleeping really well during the day. BUT then Jane figured out that night time was for sleeping (mostly) . . . YAY . . . right?? Well, now she eats constantly and cries and fusses all day! She won't hardly let me put her down. Which of course I must do, but she wails (which, I'll admit, isn't nearly as traumatizing to me as it was with my first baby). Therefore, I REALLY don't get anything done, and Audrey is shamefully neglected.

So . . . the solution. Well, I've figured out a few tricks just today after a really crappy day yesterday (as Lexi Jones can attest to since she came and rescued me for a few hours). Jane needs to eat when things are absolutely calm, or when she's half asleep, so that she doesn't have so much tummy trouble. I also had Dave run out this morning and buy a baby swing, which thankfully, Jane really likes (so far in the one time she's actually used it). I was a little worried that it was a waste though because the second time I tried putting her in it she got sooo mad. But she fell asleep on her tummy on the boppy that time, which is a new thing, probably because she'd had a pretty frantic feeding right before. So . . . it's all about the delicate balance of how she eats and what to do after each kind of feeding. I think! Today has gone really well. I got a pretty good night's sleep (well, as good as can be expected), and Dave was so helpful in helping me get things going this morning. I got a shower and both babies were dressed and fed and happy, all by 11:00 . . . which might sound pathetic, but it was a miraculous feat for us. And since Dave helped me clean up last night before bed, my house is under control.

So that's what's happening. And I've finished my little update just in time because Audrey is awake from her nap. Let me just say a few things before I go:

1. I LOVE reading everyone's blogs. I really really wish I can comment, but for now, just know that I'm reading everything you post and that you're all so great.

2. I LOVE my blog. It's such a relief to get a chance to write out my frustrations and concerns, help me bring everything back into perspective, and then to get such nice comments that make me feel so much better about things. Thank you.

3. I don't know what I would do without everyone's help and support. And I really do appreciate it so so much. You are all such wonderful friends, and I love you so much.

4. I can't say enough how much I appreciate my husband. I know it's hard for him to work so hard at school just to come home to a frantic wife and two screaming children, a messy house and still tons of work of his own to take care of. He's so great about helping me. Thank you, David, for doing the dishes AND putting Audrey to bed AND calming me down AND rocking Jane--I know it's hard, but the help is invaluable to me. I love you so much. (I'm getting choked up just writing this, so I'll stop now.)

5. My babies are beautiful. :) As are all these other cute cute kids that we have in the Branch. I love them all, and I can't wait for MORE new babies. For those of you who are pregnant, you're beautiful and I hope I can be as much help to you when YOUR babies come as you've all been to me. To the newest moms out there, I hear ya! Let me know if I can help, if anything, by lending a listening ear. And to those of you who don't have babies yet but have been so incredibly wonderful in helping those of us who do have babies, may you be blessed with easy pregnancies, quick painless labors, and angelic children when the time comes. You're all so wonderful. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

Ok, now Audrey's mad, so I'm done. Until next time . . . (if you can't tell, I'm having a hard time letting go . . . )

:)